Inowknowheparticipatedinsomethingsvicariouslythroughme,hisonlyson.WhenIplayedball(poorly),he"played"too.WhenIjoinedtheNavyhe"joined"too.AndwhenIcamehomeonleave,hesawtoitthat"Ivisitedhisoffice.Introducingme,hewasreallysaying,"Thisismyson,butitisalsome,andIcouldhavedonethis,too,ifthingshadbeendifferent."Thosewordswereneversaidaloud.
Hehasbeengonemanyyearsnow,butIthinkofhimoften.Iwonderifhesensedmyreluctancetobeseenwithhimduringourwalks.Ifhedid,IamsorryInevertoldhimhowsorryIwas,howunworthyIwas,howIregrettedit.IthinkofhimwhenIcomplainabouttrifles,whenIamenviousofanother'sgoodfortune,whenIdon'thavea"goodheart".
AtsuchtimesIputmyhandonhisarmtoregainmybalance,andsay,"Yousetthepace,Iwilltrytoadjusttoyou."
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